Romans 12:15 calls Christians to “rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep.” Recently, The Gospel Coalition published an article which says “the verse must mean something like weep with those who have a good, biblical reason for weeping.”

I do not know what event or question sparked this interpretation (although I have some guesses), but this interpretation was a surprise to me. I’ve always understood this verse to mean that we are to be compassionate to our brothers and sisters in Christ and come alongside them while they are either rejoicing or weeping. We should participate in rejoicing or weeping with them. That’s what family does with each other.

Why add the extra step of determining the good, Biblical reason for the weeping?

There are times when Jesus didn’t.

Jesus weeps when his friend Lazarus dies. Does he have a “good, Biblical reason” to weep? He knows that Lazarus isn’t going to be dead for long. Weeping is unreasonable here. Irrational. Yet Jesus does it anyway.

Even with unbelievers, Jesus had compassion for those who didn’t have a good, Biblical reason to weep. When the rich young ruler asked Jesus how to inherit eternal life, Jesus told him to sell his possession and give to the poor and the man was grieved (Mark 10:17-23). But Jesus didn’t remain unmoved. He “looked at him and showed love to him.” Jesus had an emotional response alongside this man who was grieving for the “wrong” reason.

The article mentions other examples where Jesus doesn’t weep with those who are weeping. But more often than not, I see Jesus emotionally moved towards believers and unbelievers.

For me, it’s hard to rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep. It takes selflessness and emotional vulnerability. It doesn’t come naturally to me, but the Spirit is working on me to become more compassionate towards others and their feelings. Evaluating the reason for everyone’s weeping and rejoicing is yet another barrier to me loving my neighbor. It could even be an excuse I give for ignoring others. Or for ignoring my own need to weep, something else that doesn’t come easily for me. Wait, I can’t let myself cry unless I have good, Biblical reason for it.

But the more I am with Jesus, the less I want to hold back my tears and the more I want to freely give them through sympathy and empathy. Jesus gives me heart-felt compassion over and over again. And I am working to give the same to others–and myself.

What do you think? Do we need to come up with a good, Biblical reason before we rejoice or weep with others? Comment below.



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